A Full-Time Working Mom's Guide to Staying Sane at Work

Disclaimer: I don't look this happy and fashionable BUT I get the job done. Hahaha!

A colleague asked me how I manage to stay on top of everything I needed to do. I assured her that I've only learned to do so last year; I haven't been an efficient working machine either during my young, single, child-free days. I HAD BEEN a hard worker, but I do not think I was that efficient until I had my own kid.

In fact, I remember a time when I would stay after working hours to finish grading student papers. Then, I would come home, change clothes, and prepare lesson plans all through the night. Sometimes, I would be teaching three classes in a day, running on zero hours of sleep. That was a life one can afford if one is single. These days, I'm being a wild child if I sleep at 10 pm.

So, what happened?

Last year, I had the craziest work load. I handled 4 high school English classes. Each class meets five times a week which means that I meet the same 4 classes every single day. On top of that, I was the lead teacher of our level, so I prepare most of the lessons and tests which three other teachers use. I had a class advisory; all concerns in relation to this class is my responsibility: attendance, collection of reply slips, monitoring of behavior in all school events, addressing individual student's conduct issues, and occasionally, even handling payments collection. Somewhere in between, I prepare my lessons, materials for presentation and assessment, check papers, AND pump milk. Despite all that, I never stayed beyond working hours, and it was pretty rare that I did any work at home.

Listing all that, even I'm amazed. But I guess, there are things that you can make possible with proper support and some sacrifice. If there really is one thing that I need to reiterate in this motherhood journey, you need the proper support to survive!

So, how did I ensure that I kept my responsibilities at work?

1. I planned ahead.

I think this has always been my strength: planning. I like foreseeing the end result and preparing the things that will get me there, which is basically the principle of the UBD framework of curriculum design. My working style and the existing teaching philosophy coincide and it works to my advantage. So even before the school year starts, I usually have a rough idea of what projects and test types I want to give and then I try to plan materials and lessons a week or two in advance. I am, of course, talking about teaching because that's my line of work, but being organized and anticipating the needs of your job in advance will prevent you from cramming and hopefully staying beyond working hours to submit on time.

2. I work early.

I like telling people that I don't do overtime. I'm out of the office at exactly when the official time ends. What's missing from this statement and what most people do not know is that I come to work an hour or two early. Our current yaya (caregiver) is a stay-out yaya (she goes home to her family everyday) who comes to our house early in the morning to take over my kid when I go to work. She is a blessing, I tell you. If I don't have her coming consistently at the same time everyday, my world will crumble.

When I get to school before everyone else, it is literally the calm before the storm. That's why it is my preferred work time. I eat breakfast and do work outside the hectic schedule. It is in the early morning when I get more things done because there are less interruptions. Then, I go home and put on my mommy hat so that my yaya can also be with her family early.

3. I said goodbye to social life.

I have been with my current work place for 6 years and I don't think I would consider anyone here as my close friend. I am cordial to most people, but I've never hung out with anyone outside of official school functions. I think I've heard people tell me often that I look like a serious, quiet, unapproachable person (all the euphemisms for suplada, haha!), and they are surprised that I'm easy to talk to.

Ah, but that's the price I have to pay to get as much work done in an 8-hour job. That friendly chat or coffee break can easily turn into a "wasted" hour. I hate calling this a waste because I do not consider socializing a wasted time. Your work place shouldn't just be a place that pays your salary, but it's also an environment where you meet people that inspire you in your profession or even potentially become a lifelong friend. In my context though, if I don't maximize my time, then work begins to pile up. Though at times it saddens me that I never get to hang out after work with my colleagues, I just chalk this situation up as a temporary state of life. I have no wish to speed up my son's childhood simply because I want my social life back.

4. I asked for help.

I wrote before about finally understanding my limits as a working mom. So aside from having a super support group in the form of grandparents and the yaya, I also have a super support group at work. Part of me is a control freak who wants to ensure that all aspects of the lessons should be aligned to the end goal. If it is within my powers, I would prepare all aspects of the curriculum--the lesson plan, the presentations, the assessments, the rubric, and the projects. However, that's too difficult given the limited free time I have. This limitation is a blessing in disguise because then, I really need the assistance of my co-teachers. I know it sounds strange that I find working with other people so revolutionary but I came from a smaller school set-up than my current work place and I used to prepare lesson plans by myself. I didn't have to consult anybody because I was the only teacher of the level.

However, now, everyone gets to have a say how some lessons go and what type of assessment we should have. Since everyone pitches in with the preparations, all suggestions have to be taken into consideration. To be honest, the end result really is much better in comparison to if it had only been me.

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There are days when our yaya cannot make it and my husband or I would have to take a leave from work to attend to our child. Sometimes, whatever time I have left in between periods simply isn't enough to finish everything that needed to be graded that I had to creep out of bed when my son finally falls asleep to get some work done. Those days are, thankfully, rare.

At the end of the day, if despite all measures I had to make a decision between work and home, my family is always going to be my priority.