Extended Breastfeeding and the Working Mom

My son is 2 months shy from turning two and he is still breastfeeding. Did I plan this? Not really. To be honest, I even doubted if I could make it past 6 months. I had 4 hours of teaching in an 8-hour work day and I had to pump AT LEAST 3 times to collect enough milk. If I don't pump within that day, my son will starve the next day. Add to that that my breasts aren't really producing that much milk to begin with; I had to sit through the entire 30 minutes in the nursing room of our school clinic just to squeeze out the last drop. If you add into that equation that I had lessons to prepare, papers to check, and students to follow up, I literally had no time for myself--not to eat, not even for a bathroom break.

I guess it comes with being a mother and knowing that there are things now bigger than your own self-comfort that I somehow managed to just buckle down and go through life knowing that days will eventually get easier.

And it DOES get better. Eventually, my son turned one and he started getting most of his nutrients from solid food. We finally gave him formula and his breastfeeds are limited to days I was at home and at night. I finally got some me time again at work and I didn't have to worry about my son starving if I don't make home in time. I thought I would be done soon, but here we are, my some almost two, and he would still demand for the occasional feedings (often at night or during a car ride).

I kind of reached this "extended breastfeeding" state by accident. So, why did I continue to breastfeed?

Location and Environment

It's partly because I live in the Philippines, and there's really no stigma regarding breastfeeding as compared to other countries. Women choose the way they provide nutrition to their kids and whether that is through breastfeeding or formula, both are generally regarded as acceptable methods. My mom only breastfed us for two months. My husband's mom breastfed her kids until around a year old. My cousins are breastfed until they were three. In Asian culture, breastfeeding and how long it will continue falls on the personal preference of the mother. Unlike some of the stories I read online about strangers criticizing breastfeeding moms, mothers in Filipino society do not get attacked for breastfeeding in public. We just generally avert our eyes and get on with our lives.

Helps in Recovering from Sickness

I do not have actual studies to back up if breastfeeding beyond one still protects my kid from diseases like it does when he was younger, BUT what I do know is that he does not get sick often. If he does, he recovers from it a day or two after. Our pediatrician is even amazed that the medical record of our son is limited to mostly milestone visits for vaccines. He was telling us that boys are actually more prone to illnesses in comparison to girls so it's normal that boys' medical records can be several pages long. Our son is kind of an anomaly with his three-page record.

I believe his capacity to fight off illnesses is due to breastfeeding. I actually have a pretty strong immune system so I feel that I get to share that with my son when he breastfeeds. Now that he is more mobile and can get into all nooks and crannies, I feel that this is the time when he needs to strengthen his immunity even more. When he sees something on the floor, he uses that newly-mastered knee bending and fine motor skill to pick up tiny specks on the floor and bring it straight to his mouth. And I am not exactly the type of mom who sanitizes everything my son touches. My husband, who is the OC sanitizer between us two, has thrown up his hands in defeat and just let my son roll around in filth. Hahaha! But despite this, my son is still a generally healthy boy.

Comfort and Quality Time

I have broken the rules of not allowing your child to sleep attached to your breast. It is true when they say that the child will always be relying on that to sleep so I guess I don't really recommend that you encourage using your boob as a sleeping aid. It has become a crutch and weaning him off at this age is difficult because he really throws a major tantrum if he doesn't get his booby. Sometimes it bothers me especially w

hen he is teething and wakes up every two hours. That meant sleepless nights for me. Most of the nights, it's pretty tolerable. Another catch is that I have to be in bed with him when he goes to sleep. His toddler senses tingle when I'm not by his side and he wakes up crying for his booby again. So, there is really a lot of wisdom to training your kids to sleep on their own.

With all that said, it's not something I totally hate. Sometimes, after a very busy day, it's also nice cuddling with my son and waiting for him to go to sleep. Now that he is a lot more independent, he hardly has any down time. I can only get him to sit still long enough to eat and maybe the occasional milk bottle feeding, but most of the time, he is running around the house getting into all sorts of trouble. So at night or sometimes in the car, he would smile mischievously at me and demand his dede (even though I know that he ate a lot during the previous meal). He really just want to be stuck there because it gives him some sort of comfort and on my end, it forces me to focus in that moment and BE with him.

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If I have to be completely honest about all this, I really am looking forward to finally ending this breastfeeding thing. I have read other moms' experiences where the kid just gradually got tired of breastfeeding and refused it on their own. I was hoping it would be the same with me so that I don't have to be the mean mommy who suddenly refuses the booby. In the meantime, I really have no strong motivation to end it while my son is still quite attached to his dede. They really grow up fast, and while I am typing here, wondering when I can finally be the captain of my own body again, it might just be sooner than I imagine to be.